Hustle!

Hi friend,

Trust you are doing great this weekend. It's been hectic running from pillar to post. I have several projects i'm working on via the strong belief that multiple streams of income is always best lol. Waking up at 4.30 to get ready; hitting the roads early, hectic traffic, hustle during the day, traffic on the way back, get home, dinner, work a bit more on laptop, sleep, and the cycle starts again. It just keeps me wondering... I look around in the mornings on the way out and wonder what everyone's hustle is. I wonder why the day to day hustle has become so important. In those days hustle wasn't like this. Nowadays, because of this hustle; some families don't even get to see each other or spend time with one another. Some of us even forget God in it all. It is well. 

I put a post up two days ago on my bbm that at the end of the day; it all amounts to whether we make it to heaven or not. There is no point suffering in this world and having to go suffer in hell; and also there is no point enjoying in this world and having to go suffer in hell. The Lord will grant us the grace, strength, and wisdom we need during these times. Amen. My heart was heavy during the week with this. Still is... If the little impact I can make is to you, then so be it. In all you do, put God first. It is not easy in this day and age but we're there to lean on one another and to remind each other about the important things.

As per my hustle; I have divided my project work in business into four (4) key areas; I will share more with you as time goes on. What I have decided to do is to look for 2 young people who are looking for an opportunity to work or have a business; If they are willing and ready, i'll have each of them run my ideas for 2 separate segments of business and give them the resources they need plus some room to perform. This is on a very small scale. Nothing big or fancy at all; and we can hopefully build a small unit from there. It's tough to get four things going at the same time with the same pool of resources but I'd like to try this and see how it goes. You never know until you try. I also pray the Lord will guide me through the process.

I leave you with some fab image quotes for you to upload on your devices/social media for inspiration.

L8r

Baby Blues...

Hello Friend,

Trust you are doing good today? Yea? :)

It's been a HECtic week lol. I had an expo to attend yesterday but I was so poofed; I decided to take a break and boy did it help. From feeling so week and frail to well rested and upbeat. Nice!

So full school runs begins tomorrow and I am so pumped (almost lol). And I'm basically at the all important cross road of when to get my baby into creche. For my 1st child, she stayed home till she was about 1 and a half yrs old. That was not kool because she became so uncomfortable around people and it took us a LONG time to get her out of that. She wouldn't talk to people etc. Needless to say I am not trying that again. My 2nd started daycare at 7mths and he was fabulous. Mixed well, talked very early; he blended very well and because I did exclusive breastfeeding with him for 6mths he was never ill etc. No complaints. My 3rd started at about 5mths or so... (as you can see its reducing by the number of months). He was also fab. I also did exclusive with him and he was fabulous. he blended well. Wasn't ill and he is the most extroverted of the kids.

So... with my lil' miss (No. 4) who is about to clock 4 months, I'm like when should I start her off? The creche said they're ready to take her in but I think I'm gonna start when she is about 4/5 mths. I'm thinking once she is sitting and has started taking a lil bit of cereal. That of course means I can't be fully at work all day, everyday. So it's a sacrifice I have to make. My main concern is getting enough breast milk for her. She isn't exclusive, but I try to keep her formula feeding to one a day, MAX 2 bottles. So because I won't want them feeding her too much formula and i might have an issue freezing and taking enough of the breast milk to school for her (the commute is about 2hrs to their school); been praying about it for a while and that's what my spirit says I should do. So in another month she can join the rest of the kids, if she's sitting and has started a lil cereal.

The decisions mothers have to take and the stuff we get to worry about is funny and amazing at the same time.

So... because school runs begins tomorrow and my lil miss is almost clocking four months (2nd week in May); I have to begin my abs and exercise tomorrow. I have been waiting for a gym near my office to open but they haven't so I have to resort to my home dancing exercises. I am really hoping the gym opens in about 2 wks so that I can get in some serious abs and core work out. I basically divided the exercises into parts of my body, cos over the years I've seen what works and what doesn't. I am apple shaped and so I've learned to work my shoulders and under arms with dumbbells. For my abs; I do abs and core work outs. For my butt I do squats; for my thighs if able to gym I use a climbing or stepping machine. If I don't get to go to the gym I just do forward bending squats. Phewww! If I do those consistently a nice figure emerges. Not hour glass or pear like I'd like, but a nice one lolll.

I don't really diet (food wise); because once I start exercising I generally am put off by most greasy and unhealthy foods. And if I indulge, I just ensure I work twice the scheduled work out for the day. So... wish me well oh. It should take about a month or two for me to get where I'd like to be. I pray it goes well and I stay committed to it. Will fill you in as I go along :)

I generally think that once a woman gets preggie it takes about a year and a half to get yourself back together. I plan to breastfeed till she is about 1 and a half or 2 yrs (which is what I did with the boys). But each child is unique in their own way. We'll see how it works out. It's a long and beautiful process and I thank God for the opportunity to go through it.

I leave you with this:

1 Tim 4: 8

“For bodily exercise profiteth little: but godliness is profitable unto all things, having promise of the life that now is, and of that which is to come”.

L8r

Relocating to Nigeria (Part 2)

Hello Friend,

Service was great today (as usual). We had Dr. Okey Onuzo in the house yayyy... and from my MN days; it's always so exciting to have him give the word. I really got peeved by something when I got to church which got me in a mood; but at the end of the day it thankfully went well.

I also got some really bad news. Heard someone who I knew on campus (university days) passed away. So so sad. Honestly, I just pray the Lord will have mercy on us all, and allow us live the kind of lives that we need to live. It is well. Father Lord... "Teach us to number our days, that we may apply our hearts unto wisdom" Psalm 90: 12

I'd like to continue with the relocation to Nigeria project...

So, we boarded our KLM flight, stopped over as usual in Amsterdam and then we were finally in Lagos. The first welcome gift we got was... when we were at the entry port, we presented the kids US passports (we were obviously not thinking). They subsequently asked for the kids (ages 3 and 1) visas and we didn't have 'em. We totally blanked out in ALL of our running around. So of course naija customs seized their passports (regardless of all the begging and pleading) and asked us to report to their office the following day. The kids were signed in under my passport and they wrote us a nice ticket with a very nice levy we had to pay. Just great!!! We were soooo worried (but we went there the following day and it was all resolved).

Anywhoo... the first thing I noticed when we got into the car and got on our way was; there were NO STREET LIGHTS!!! Yiikes! I grew up in Lagos and we'd traveled to quite a number of countries and back but for the life of me, I had never noticed that the Nigerian roads had no street lights. I hadn't stayed out of naija for that long and after driving all the time in MN; my eyes had just adjusted to it. I could hardly see anything! And that was really scary for me. Thankfully after Fashola (BRF), the story has changed. We bless God.

We had arrived and this was it... no looking back. No retreat, no surrender lol. (We noticed after getting to the house that my hubby had left a bag that contained his laptop, our hard drives, his brand new phones, our digital camera etc at the check area in Amsterdam. I told him not to put it all in one bag but what do I know... 2 days later we found out the bag was found and put on our flight so they could give to us while we were disembarking. But trust naija, they never delivered it to us. With all the strings we pulled, it was just unfortunate, we didn't get the bag back).

A few things to note, if attempting this fete:

- You need to realize that they will be a culture shock for you. Back in the day when people said this (prior to me living abroad) I actually thought they were just being silly. No! it's real. It will take you time to adjust and yes, you will look and sound weird and very silly to some. E.g. writing your dates wrong 4/19/2015 instead of naija 19/4/2015. Saying 'I'm going to the gas station' instead of 'petrol station', and so many others things. You will also go from excited, to disappointed, to depressed; to eventual 'kamu' lol. Kamu means a state of 'no choice than to be calm'. All of this is completely okay. You have to go through the process of flushing out the Americana in you. So many people come back with the attitude of  'I won't change my acquired behaviors and attitudes acquired abroad' but mehnnn naija will help you adjust it by force.

- Things work much much slower in Nigeria. If you'd like to post something or get something; the general process is not at the speed you're used to. It has definitely improved since we got back in 2008 but you generally have to be calmer with your expectations. For instance we were told our container would take 7 weeks. it eventually took about 20 GOOD weeks. It wasn't funny. All our plans had been made with 7 weeks in mind but you can imagine that this had to change. Hence when planning for such, give yourself a little room. Ours was because there was a strike/delay of some sort but generally 12-16 weeks is okay.

- You need to ensure you have a good grip on what you plan to do work wise. Have a back up plan (e.g. registered business you can start). I waited a month and a half and started business straight up. For others, you may want to work the field to see what's out there. You have to be aggressive with getting yourself out there in naija.

- You need to ensure you have accommodation down. We struggled with this a bit, because our expectation was slightly off; and this was with all our research and planning oh... So ensure you have dotted every i and crossed every t. It's important for a seamless transition.

- You need to hit the ground running. Once here you need to get on with all the things you need to do. Create a list e.g. 'get kids into school', 'get business up and running' etc. These can then be broken down into tasks. And of course ensure you have made arrangements for a vehicle and driver to move you around (of course for those who come in as expatriates, a lot of this is taken care of already). 

- Take your time before driving on your own. Even though I loved to drive before I left Lagos and even missed Lagos driving while away, I still had to pace myself; but it didn't take me long at all.

- Business didn't take long to kick off for me because I connected really quickly with my friends and got referrals from them. So connect: and network quickly. A lot of individuals believe those who come back shouldn't have it easy, and shouldn't think they'd get what their counterparts (who they left behind) have achieved in an instant. It definitely doesn't come cheap. So lastly you have to 'do the time', 'pay your dues'... There is no way of avoiding it.

I leave you with this:

Proverbs 3: 5-6

“Trust in the LORD with all your heart And do not lean on your own understanding. 6In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He will make your paths straight. 7Do not be wise in your own eyes; Fear the LORD and turn away from evil”

Phil 4: 6

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

Isaiah 58: 11

The LORD will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail.

May the Lord guide you in all your life plans...

L8r

Wendy Williams on Women, Marriage & Career

Hello friend,

How are you doing? Fab i'm sure. It's funny how sometimes you just have so much to write about and other times you just don't feel like writing anything at all. The last 2 days just breezed by like it was 5 minutes. I was looking forward to getting back to school runs next week, but the kids school moved the resumption date back (cross eyes); so I get to have another week of 'part leave'. And the work keeps piling higher and higher and higher. Okay, so check this out. My attention was drawn (thanks to social media and trending etc) to Wendy William's recent comments on women, marriage, and career. According to the interview:

"Never one to shy away from provocative points of view, she is unabashed about the challenges women face in balancing the intense demands of both career and family. “My suggestion to women is always…use your entire 20s to work your behind off in your career… And then think about meeting that guy,” cautions the 50-year-old. “‘Cause we’re the ones that lose in marriage. Not men.”

She further points out buyer beware:   “It is difficult for men to accept really successful career women. Whether it be that we out-earn them or that our name is brighter than theirs.  I also feel like marriage and babies stunt a woman’s growth career-wise…Once you get married and have kids, you can’t do all the things that you used to do and maintain this important precious thing that you built as a family.” Full article here.

Do you agree? Well... I totally agree with the parts that I underlined. The other parts which are quite controversial for me are; 

1) Do we lose in marriage? Ummn I don't think lose is the right word. Yes we are usually the one's to sacrifice more (physically, emotionally, etc); but we gain a whole lot of love from our children etc.

2) Do babies stunt a woman's growth career-wise? Well... I certainly agree to an extent. For a duration; yes. But the controversy here for me is... For how long? And can a woman really recover from that? and

3) Once you get married you can't do all the things that you used to do... Definitely true lolll. But you can try to get back some of it. With this one, should one just let go; or should one keep fighting till you start doing ALL the things you used to do.

The information is a lot to take in especially for someone who isn't or hasn't been married. I had a conversation at the office one.. Can a woman really have it all? Can a woman be a huge success across the board. We talked and talked about it (you can hardly find that many women who has). Moderate success across the board yes! But huge across the board; not many. Meaning you're like a Folorunsho Alakija in business; a Joyce Meyer spiritually; a Kim Kadarshian physically; a Martha Stewart in the kitchen; a '17 & counting' kind of mother with at least 3 or 4 kids; a gymnast in the bedroom etc. Unfortunately that is not too possible. Hence balance for a woman is key. Better to be balanced across board than to be completely lacking in one area. A woman's life is challenging and we need to rise to it. Wisdom is key. Let's ruminate on this for a while; i shall surely come back to it and dissect it into smaller areas for us to learn about.

I leave you with this:

James 1:5

"If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him".

L8r

'Part Leave'

Hello Friend,

Okay... so I'm currently on part leave lol. What that means is that I work from home because the kids are on holiday. I basically work from my laptop; and when I have meetings I drop the kids off at my mum or besties' place. Sometimes I just straight up journey to my mum's place; work from there (cos it's not far from my office), and then journey home again. I do that because it allows me dash to the office wherever something comes up (as I live on the Lekki Epe axis and work on the mainland - don't ask me why lol).

I also don't have a maid; with four kids. Why? because it just doesn't work. After much holla from my friends and mum, I finally got a cleaning lady, while I was heavily pregnant. The lady is supposed to come every day except Sundays. 2-6pm or 3 -7pm workdays, and all day till about 5pm Saturdays but guess what? We don't get home till about 7/8pm weekdays and the weekends, she comes and in 2-4 hours max she says she is done, and is in a hurry to leave. We also cannot wait for her to leave cos she just constitutes a nuisance after 3hrs. Her job description is basically cleaning (dishes, sweeping, mopping, kids laundry, clean bathrooms). I don't allow her cook nor bath for kids nor all that kinda stuff. Just because it's stuff I'd rather do.

And the way it works now during the week I end up doing all the work. plus Sundays and even half of Saturday. so what's the point of having her at all; when I still do everything. So I told her it wasn't working and she needed to find something else (that was three weeks ago). Well... she asked the guy who brought her to solicit and didn't let me rest. So... she's back. Told her I'd try one more month and revise. I already know what the solution and revision is; and that is for her to work only Saturdays and cut her pay in half which is much more than fair (cos that's just four days a month). I love cleaning and mopping anyway so it works. What I don't like is doing laundry arghhh... Did I mention she doesn't even iron the kid clothes. I don't mind ironing too; if there's light and all the kids are occupied lol.

So... the part leave works till the kids get back to school. And then we start the school runs etc again and I can get back to my seat at the office. It's a bit cumbersome because there are bills and I still need to pull in a certain amount of business and profit every month or else they'd be a mega back log of bills. But at the end of the day I imbibe the Nike spirit 'Just do it'. I don't even think about it; I just do it. Like I told a friend of mine, if I sit down to start thinking of how much stuff I need to do or accomplish I'd break down. So, no time for that. The only thing I do is whenever I have projects at the office not going well; or when I need way much than is coming in, or its just generally getting over hefty; I take a day off and just sleep. That can't happen on a school day for the kids though lol; neither can it happen more than once in six months.I generally pray and come up with fab ideas the following day.

That's part leave in a nut shell. I have two fab meetings lined up and I am so excited. One is tomorrow; so wish me well.

I pray the Lord shall grant us all the strength that we need. Amen

Isaiah 40:29 He giveth power to the faint; and to them that have no might he increaseth strength.

2 Sam 22:33 God is my strength and power: and he maketh my way perfect.

Ps 18:2 The Lord is my rock, and my fortress, and my deliverer; my God, my strength, in whom I will trust; my buckler, and the horn of my salvation, and my high tower.

Ps 46: 1 God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.

L8r

Relocating to Nigeria (Part 1)

Hello Friend,

Trust you are doing great today. It's already past midnight, so it's a new day.

Okay let's rewind back to 2008. I woke up one day and my hubby says 'what do you think about moving back to Nigeria?'. I was like whattttt (happyyy) (in my mind lol)... didn't say it out cos I felt he might panic and change the conversation. But I kept calm and said 'what do you mean?', And he says he thinks it'd be a great time to move back to Nigeria since we're both done with our masters degrees. Yayyy... Needless to say I never thought that day would come. I was brought up with the whole notion that living abroad was best for holidays; and living in Nigeria and being part of change and development was much better. Getting married and having to move to MN was great, but I just felt I could do more in Nigeria (even though the standard of living in the US is better), plus the cons for me far outweigh the pros. So... I was excited! We started planning... Hmmn!

It was a herculean task! And I can tell you 'DO NoT Try This At Home!' lolll... Just kidding.

There were different parts; and we did it how we knew how to (then). Of course after getting here, they're a couple of things I would change but thank God, we prayed and God really guided us.

We had to pack (and decide what items would go with us to Nigeria). It took about a month to pack. We were both working, and one of us had to stop work first. Can I remember? (was so long ago). I believe it was moi first and then hubby stopped work two wks later... something like that. So I started the daily packing process and then he joined in.

We bought items we thought we'd need in an apartment in Lagos; and tried to have a yard sale for left over items (didn't work). We ended up just giving all the stuff away. And what we couldn't give away, we just left in the house. We sold our Ford and Chrysler vehicles and got two cars we felt would work well on Nigerian roads. Also don't bother bringing hefty items that do not match Nigerian voltage e.g. washing machines, TVs etc. Not worth it. best to get items that will match the voltage.

We had decided we'd get a full container (shipping); which cost an arm and a leg of course. So we got U-haul boxes, a U-haul van etc. Did all the packing, all the loading on the truck, the long driveeee to where the container was, and the off loading of the truck. Trust me ALL the above was hectic and went by so fast.

Before we could say Jack Robinson; the flight date had come. We had about ten days left and then had to drive all the way to Maryland for my Aunt's birthday event (which was like a mini family re-union). By the time we got back, we only had a short period (2 days or so) to say bye in church and have a mini send forth done for us at service... (towards the end went by really fast).

Here's the breakdown of tasks:

- Ensure you have informed family etc of your decision and pending arrival to Nigeria
- Shop and pack up all relevant items (furniture, electronics, kids stuff, clothes, books etc). Items must be able to withstand the shipping duration - up to 3/4 months)
- If getting a shipping container (vehicles etc - vehicles need to have complete papers and documentation etc. All items including furniture should have complete documentation/receipts etc)
- Ensure you have your tickets purchased, up-to-date passports, visas etc
- Ensure you have all your school original certificates (i.e. if you studied any program, courses etc)
- Ensure you have all your banking documents up-to-date
- Ensure you disconnect/discontinue all bills you've been paying
- Ensure you have all hospitals records/information you might need
- Back up ALL your data from all your hard drives
- Ensure all items going into container are packed and labeled properly (e.g. glass should be packed well and labelled fragile etc. Label all your boxes)
- Ensure you sort out your accommodation issues before proceeding to Nigeria (where will you stay? For how long?)
- Remember and consider that in Nigeria things move a LOT more slowly (we're hoping the wind of change 2015 will change this)
- Ensure you have pre-registered a business, have a job offer, or several job interviews lined up
- Ensure you have all essentials packed with you to take via air; because the shipped items may not get to Nigeria on time (3-4 months). Meaning whatever you need in 3-4 months should arrive with you.
- Also ensure once you have your vehicles containerized you have a rental or borrowed vehicle to move around with.

As we go along if I remember any more, I will update :)

Isn't God wonderful? Sometimes I look back on this relocation move and I know 'It was just God'

WOTD: Deut 11;22-25

22 For if ye shall diligently keep all these commandments which I command you, to do them, to love the Lord your God, to walk in all his ways, and to cleave unto him; 

23 Then will the Lord drive out all these nations from before you, and ye shall possess greater nations and mightier than yourselves. 

24 Every place whereon the soles of your feet shall tread shall be yours: from the wilderness and Lebanon, from the river, the river Euphrates, even unto the uttermost sea shall your coast be. 

25 There shall no man be able to stand before you: for the Lord your God shall lay the fear of you and the dread of you upon all the land that ye shall tread upon, as he hath said unto you.


L8r

Is she reallyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy back?

Hello Friend,

I guess I wasn't really back in 2009 lol... If you count from my last post in March 2008; It's been 7yrs!!! I cannot believe it. Can you?

All through these years; I've tried to start another blog because I just felt the transition was too wide a gap to fill from Minneapolis to Lagos. Where would I start from? The gist was a lot, PLUS settling down here took wayyy much more time and effort than we expected. But... every once in a while I'd come back, and read through my posts and just go on with my other new life here in Lagos.

I basically just kept this blog like a memorabilia/old diary that I'd read through to remind me of the days in Minnesota. I didn't want to delete my posts on the right column like; 'fave tv shows', 'stuff I miss' (e.g. how I missed Mr. Biggs doughnuts). I wanted to remember all that. But I have since realized that holding on to this would of course continue to derive me of making a new diary that will be old in a few yrs too lol... and of course time just rolled by like no man's business.

Okay so a few baseline things have happened in 7 years (wow).
- We moved from Minneapolis to Lagos in Oct 2008 (reunite with family and old friends)
- I started running my business in Lagos in Jan 2009
- I lost my precious grandad (mum's dad) in 2009
- I now have a new church, Pastor etc
- I have had two other kids. one in 2010 and the other just this year 2015 (making it four now).
The rest you'll catch up with via my posts.

Also
- There's been the emergence of blackberry, whatsapp, and all ramifications of social media plus all the new punctuations' such as Lol, Smh, Lbt, etc

Through the years there have been many ups and downs, some of which I may be permitted to share; but I thank God because whether up or down, God has shown himself faithful. I tell you! I'm thankful I'm beginning at year 7. 7 is the number of perfection, so maybe it's for a reason. Numbers have their meanings and significance.

You can read more about numbers here.

I'm glad to be back and pray for the strength to carry on.

I leave you with this word:

Psalm 90:12 King James Version (KJV).
  
'So teach us to number our days, that we may apply our hearts unto wisdom'

L8r